Chapter Twenty-Eight
Carmella was shocked to see him so broken but before she could react, he wiped his tears and got up from his chair.
"I'm sorry to bother you Carmella with my unwanted feelings. I'll apologize to you every day till you forgive me," He said and strode off towards the main door. Opening it, he left, closing the door softly. Carmella stood transfixed to the spot. She was hurt and she just couldn't forgive him yet but something about what he said softened her a little. His tears moved her a lot.
Slowly she walked over to her bedroom and sat down, hugging her knees to her chest.
Jaxon walked out of her apartment brokenly. He knew that she wouldn't forgive her so easily and he had lost her trust but his determination didn't waver a bit. He would try for her forgiveness till his last breath.
He went to his Las Vegas office to check the ongoing work. Afterwards, he dragged himself to his apartment to eat and sleep although his heart wanted to be with Carmella. When he couldn't get a wink of sleep he went over to Carmella's building and knocked on her door.
It was 12 o'clock midnight and he didn't expect her to open her door. He was about to go away when Carmella opened the door while rubbing the sleep off her eyes. Her eyes widened with surprise at the sight of a dishevelled Jaxon at her doorstep.
"What are you doing here at midnight?" She asked him bewildered.
"I can't sleep, Carmella. Please let me sleep on your sofa," he begged her.
"You can sleep in the spare bedroom, " she said, turning away and going into her own bedroom. Jaxon's heart sang with excitement. He closed the main door and walked over to the spare bedroom to sleep. With her just on the other side of the wall, he easily dozed off to blissful sleep. There was hope in his heart that maybe she would forgive him soon.
Carmella had no idea why she allowed him inside and let him sleep in the bedroom next to hers. Maybe even after all this, she still loved him?
The next morning, she woke up to a delicious aroma of mouthwatering fresh breakfast coming from the kitchen. Getting up, she freshened up quickly and went over to the kitchen. Her jaws dropped seeing a shirtless Jaxon making breakfast and humming a tune. Why did he need to be shirtless? Women always cooked wearing all their clothes! Ignore, ignore, ignore, she chided herself. She rolled her eyes but the food looked too delicious to ignore.
"Good morning and thank you for letting me in, Carmella. I had the best sleep after a long time," he admitted with a grin. Carmella smiled at his infectious mood.
"Come and eat. You're looking weak, " he said serving the food onto two plates and carrying them to the table. Carmella wondered how he knew that she was feeling very weak. In fact, her head swooned every now and then. She hardly went out nowadays.
"Thank you for making breakfast. I don't feel like cooking for myself anymore," she said and he looked at her with concern. Was she depressed? She showed all symptoms of clinical depression. Maybe she was skipping her meals because of it. He would have to move in here and cook for her and feed her.
"If you don't eat Carmella how will you ever have another baby?" He asked gently.
Carmella stared at him trying to grasp the fact that he too wanted another baby. "I'll never be able to have another baby. God's punishing me since I'm a bad mother," she informed him.
"Not at all. It was destiny, Carmella. If you would have been a bad mother, you wouldn't have shed so many tears for our baby," he coaxed. "My mom never once thought about me when she left. She never called me. She disappeared from my life and I was just ten years old. What would you call her then?" He asked, his eyes filled with pain.
"That makes me a very good mom, isn't it Jaxon?" She asked, brightening up a little.
"Yes baby," he said softly. After that talk, he was sure that she was suffering from clinical depression and needed counselling. "If you're in doubt, we can go to a counsellor and ask her too about her opinion. What do you say?" He asked hesitantly hoping that she wouldn't react adversely to his suggestion.
She looked at him for some time. "Okay, can we go and ask today? I want to know," she agreed and he heaved a sigh of relief.
"Sure we'll go today," he promised.
"This is delicious," she said eating up the food. They ate silently, relishing the food on their plates.
"I'm moving into your apartment. I can't live alone. Would you let me stay with you?" He asked her gently.
"Only if you do the cooking," she said with a small smile on her lips.
"Sure I will," he said with a shit-eating grin on his face. "I'll go get my stuff, okay?"
She nodded, clearing the table and going to the sink to wash them. He noticed that she just stood there at the sink, lost in her thoughts without washing a single dish.
"Carmella, I can do the dishes when I return. Why don't you lie down or study a bit?" He suggested.
"I'll lie down. I'm feeling very tired," she said, dragging her feet to her bedroom.
Jaxon took the apartment keys and went away. He would have a duplicate made. He went to his apartment to get his stuff. Loading them onto his car, he locked his apartment and went to meet Ethan Parker.
He informed Carmella's parents about her condition and asked for suggestions. He didn't know of any good psychological counsellors around and being residents of this place, he hoped her dad would know who he could take her to. Her dad gave him the number of a good counsellor and he thanked her parents and left.
He went to the grocery mart nearby to get lots of foodstuffs as he had seen that she didn't have anything apart from cereals and milk at her apartment. Happy with his purchases, he drove off to her apartment.
He unlocked the door and went into the apartment. He saw that Carmella was still sleeping which was odd since she was always active and about since early morning. He allowed her to sleep and arranged his stuff in the spare bedroom. Next, he arranged all the groceries into the pantry and refrigerator.
He saw that there were two baskets full of laundry yet to be done. The apartment was also dirty and hadn't been cleaned in a while. He cleaned the apartment, vacuumed it well, did the laundry work as well as the pending dishes. It was hard work and it took him two hours.
He had just finished his work when Carmella woke up and came to the living room. "I'm sorry that I overslept," she said, apologetically. After eating a full meal and after that talk with Jaxon, she had felt so relaxed and drowsy that slept like a baby for the first time since she was released from the hospital.
Feeling better after that rest, she looked around the sparkling apartment appreciatively. "You didn't need to do it all by yourself. You could have woken me up," she said, feeling guilty.
"It's alright Carmella. You needed the rest. Are you feeling better?" He asked her.
"Yes, thank you, " she said, breathing in the fresh clean air of the apartment.
"Good, because we're going out to lunch, " he announced.
Carmella's eyes went wide. "No, I can't. Everyone's going to laugh at me," she said with apprehension.
"Why should they laugh at you, Carmella?" He was worried by now. Her depression was deeper than he had guessed. She needed immediate help.
"I don't look beautiful anymore. Everyone easily manages multiple pregnancies and easily give birth to so many children and I couldn't handle a single one," she said softly.
"You look more beautiful now Carmella. A little weak maybe but still breathtakingly beautiful. It was an accident that you lost our baby. It wasn't your fault at all. Anyone can have an accident, it's all a part of life. Also, who cares what others think? No one has so much time to notice others. So, relax, take a shower and get ready. We will go out to lunch," he tried to convince her. Carmella nodded and went to take a shower.
Jaxon too showered and got ready for their lunch date. He called up the counsellor and fixed an appointment with her. After lunch, he would take Carmella for a session with the counsellor. He waited for her in the living room when she came out wearing an off-white casual sheath dress. Her hair was untied and cascaded down her shoulders, casting a soft halo around her face. She looked angelic and ethereal almost. This was too good to be true.
"Ready to go on a date with me?" He asked with a wink.
